Random Babblings of a Lunatic - Issue #1
Column by: The Loony Guy on 05/11/2003
My shrinks here at the Loony Bin all agree that Babbling is better therapy for me than Basket Weaving...so here we go again with a Fan's thoughts on the RCW.

The more I think about it, this Extreme Championship match should be a Chartbuster! As of this writing, most of the participants have been announced with only 3 slots left open. So far I have to stay with my original prediction of Randy Allen but Dude Rock could take the Gold also! It's good to see Shawn Parks in the mix too. If you missed RCW: The Gathering, Parks put on a heck of a show there. When there are 4 left, it will become a Fatal Four Way Match. Wouldn't it be cool to see those final four being Trik, Livewire, Dude, and Allen? And what's up with The Informer getting into this thing? I bet next week's supply of Valium that he doesn't last more than 60 seconds! And they call me crazy! And who is this "Great Mecco"? Didn't I see The Lovely Erin defeat and embarrass him royally somewhere else? Maybe I'm confusing him with someone else, but confusion is my favorite state to visit. Anyway, I believe that this match will deliver in a big way!

This venue in West Union that "Injection" will be held at is a good place for a wrestling event. Not a bad seat in the place, the fans get close to the action. The only drawback is the ceiling seems a little low for the high-fliers but it is worth the drive. Some more visible signs pointing to the venue this time would be nice though.

Now if I were Commissioner instead of the Masterweenie, here is how I would fill out the rest of the card for "Injection":

Dude Rock vs. Trik Nasty In a "Roach on a Pole" match. The winner gets wiped! A couple King Cobras would work too!
The Mastermind vs. Jason Taylor in "Who's RCW's Biggest Hemorrhoid" match. The loser gets thrown into a tub of Preparation H!
Randy Allen vs. Zodiac in a "Straight Jacket" match. The loser is the one who gets put in one. Yeah, they could even borrow one of mine!
The Main Event would be Syren vs. Ivanna B. Eight-one in a Bra & Panties match! Oh Yeah!!! Need I say more???

Other names for RCW: Injection that could have been used:

If Beautiful Bobby L. Was headlining, it could be called RCW: Infection
If Syren was headlining, it could be called RCW: Erection
If LOTD was headlining, it could be called RCW: Illegal Immigration
If Trik Nasty was headlining, it could be called RCW: Intoxication

SOMEBODY STOP ME!!!

A Wrestling Tip: If you wrestlers find it hard to hoist Meltdown's carcass over the top rope, just pitch a Pork Chop over the rope, he'll jump after it guaranteed and eliminate himself!

Hey Ham, Gandi, Kyd, Scab, Truth, Kris, Fyre, Chuck, Hash, Tlynn, Blizzard, Nancy, and the rest of you Messageboard Freaks..... Where the heck are you????? Time to crank it up!!!

The more I think about it, I have to go with Vile winning the Belt! But why is this guy always in such a crappy mood? Can you say Zoloft?

Shouldn't Dude Rock change the name of his show from "The Rock Shop" to "The Head Shop"?

Ask me about my new Frontal Lobotomy!!!

If RCW insists on long intermissions again, how about letting a local Rock Band play during it?

Bring back Norman the Lunatic, The Missing Link, and The Moon Dogs!!! My kind of people!

DARN! Nurse Rozetta just came in and told me that I have to stop, it's time for my Shock Treatments! Thanks for reading and I'll see you at RCW: Injection in exotic West Union, Ohio on May 23!